Cheysuli Continues to Be Hounded by the Press

IMG_7005aFrustrated by press rumors that she snores, Cheysuli has been kicking herself all weekend.

Rumors started shortly after arch nemesis, The Male, woke in the middle of the night and sleepily asked the Woman what was that?  The Woman answered in an intelligible mumble of “Hmm?” 

“That singing,” the Male said.

The Woman leaned up and listened more closely and said, “That’s Cheysuli.”

“That’s Chey?!” The Male said incredulous.  “She’s snoring.”

“Umm” the Woman mumbled.

At that point rumor mills had already started about the former candidate snoring.  Rather than picking up on the lovely sounding concept that Cheysuli SINGS as she sleeps, critics immediately latched on to the fact that she may snore. 

“How could we have a leader or even a wanna be leader who snores?” said one unnamed source.  “After all, if she had been elected and fallen asleep on a foreign dignitary, imagine the scandal!”

“They need to stop imagining things.  Chey is a cat.  She’s EXPECTED to fall asleep on laps,” said one staunch supporter.  It appears that even well after the election, Cheysuli can get no rest from the press.

Meezer Monday (NOT)

img_6708aSo there I was. TWO WEEKS and one day without my human. And what happens on Monday? Do you THINK that is me? Of course not.

The Woman has to show off that she was out galvanting around and cheating on me with Little Isis. I know. It’s not Isis’ fault. After all, we cats must stand together (although the Male has a photo on his facebook of the Woman petting Little Isis and Isis lettting her). I am not pleased that not only was the Woman gone but she was visiting other cats.

She met my new canine cousin Snickers, a “morkie.” Not this does not mean Snickers was from Orkie. He is a Yorkie-Maltese mix and is quite small and chasable. The Woman also met the Male’s family, Daphne and Abby who are West Highland Terriers. Daphne got sick while the Woman was there and she had to help take her to the vet. Daphne, like a good dog, was fine about the time the vet walked into the room. Before that, all feared she might die. A dog after my heart. I need to work on that one. Not that I will ever get to eat the table scraps that Daphne gets but still… a cat can dream

In punishment for the Woman’s transgressions, I have set Gemini to meowing all night to keep the humans awake. And I jump up in bed as Gemini starts getting horse so that they don’t dare fall back to sleep. Nothing like payback right?

Cheysuli Tagged As Potential Supreme Court Justice

img_5593aFormer Candidate Cheysuli’s name has come up as one of the names on the short list for the Supreme Court Justice to replace David Souter who is said to be retiring soon.

While there was controversy in the presidential election about Cheysuli due to her species and her age and even potentially her birth place, the Supreme Court has no such requirements. Anyone can be a justice if they are appointed and pass muster with Congress.

Popular with the democratic Senators, Cheysuli should have few problems in passing the Senate should President Obama actually nominate her. However, detractors suggest that Obama wants someone with real world experience and probably some law background. “Cheysuli has no real world experience whatsoever. She lives in a fantasy world. Cats can’t really be president,” stated an unnamed skeptic.

We shall have to wait and see.

Cheysuli Speaks Out on Contractual Obligations

img_6281aSometimes you just have to take out your aggression against things that annoy you. Do you realize that The Male is Contractually obligated to go see the upcoming Star Trek movie in May. Can you imagine?  And he thinks it is okay.  He has absolutely no idea how the rest of live, having to wait until another day to see it, or knowing they will have to see it with someone who has already viewed the movie.

I find that some of these people under contracts have contracts that keep them completely out of touch with the real world.  I mean how many people get to go see Star Trek on opening day with their employer?!  I’m appalled. I’m ashamed.  I’m mortified that I live with the Male.

Okay so I’m mortified that I live with that male anyway… but still…

I can’t believe what some employers write into contracts and people expect to be paid for! I mean he also draws a salary!  Of course his salary does pay for my food… but I really am annoyed that he gets to have fun when I am not around.

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Meezer Monday

img_6297aThis weekend the Male saw a rat in the garage.   No, he didn’t look in the mirror! He got out of the car and saw something that looked like a ran run towards the outside.   He and the Woman had to go to the store and got some traps and then they backed the cars out of the garage and looked around and found some chewed up bags of grass seed and moss killer!  And so they cleaned all of that up and then put out the traps.

They wanted me and Gemini to go explore the garage but I refused to go out.

You know, the Woman always says she doesn’t know when I eat and she can’t figure out why I am so plump right now…

Cheysuli: Forgotten!

img_6043aShocking news from the cat world. Former Presidential Candidate Cheysuli had her birthday forgotten by one and all. Her humans forgot it was her birthday and therefore no one announced it. There were no parties. Apparently the former candidate sat by the window for hours waiting for adoring fans but no one showed up.

Around noon the Pooses for Peace heard that it was her birthday and set up a surprise party that runs through today. Most cats, having heard the news late are arriving today.

Additionally, reporters at the cat blogosphere were shocked when the candidate called PERSONALLY to ask why her birthday announcement had been forgotten. It seems they had her listed as Feb 29 not March 1 (although her papers say March 1). Having remedied that several artists had birthday renditions of Cheysuli made up for this year.

“I’m just so thankful that I have friends like this. I mean my humans didn’t even think about myhappybirthdaycheysuli birthday until we started talking hams for all the other cats and suddenly the light dawned on the woman. It was my birthday too. It’s up to the humans to arrange parties and such. Can you imagine how crushed I was? I give and give and give and no one seems to care–even about my birthday,” Cheysuli whined.

“I had such hopes for a major birthday bash somewhere and now it’s too late. I’ll have to wait until next year, but last year I was promised a bash. Can you imagine? They even promised! Is there another cat so put upon? Oh wait–yes Yao-lin suffers as well.”

Cheysuli Shut Out of Awards

img_6032aOnce again, former Presidential Candidate and socialite Cheysuli has been passed over by the Academy. While not a starlet in her own right, many in the high social circles that Cheysuli frequents are regularly invited to the awards. Not the former Candidate.

“It’s probably specist,” said one insider.

“I think it’s just that they are distancing themselves from her. She did run for president and she lost. Hollywood can’t abide a loser,” said another.

“Umm…maybe they don’t allow cats where they give the awards?” Suggested one blonde socialite who was invited. Fortunately there were no Cheysuli supporters nor were the Pooses for Peace represented there so she was unharmed. It has been requested that newspapers and magazines with hold her name so she is not harmed by over zealous anti-specist reformers.

Cheysuli remains unavailable for comment. Further rumors suggest that she is over eating again and that it’s this wide spread rejection that is causing her to do so. Until she gives a statement, we won’t know for sure

Cheysuli Sheds Pounds

img_6042aAfter receiving a furminator, Cheysuli reported shed pounds of fur. The former presidential candidate is said to have stepped on the scale with high hopes. Finding that she had not lost a single ounce, she was forced to confront herself in a mirror.

“You know, it was sort of bad before but now she really looks silly,” said one insider.

“You can’t hide the football like look without any fur,” said another. In fact, rumors abound that the humans around Cheysuli tried to induce vomiting in hope that she actually HAD swallowed a football at a wild superbowl party. Unfortunately, Cheysuli vomited up nothing more than a bit of food.

Cheysuli is said to be hoping that a coat made from the shed fur of Gemini can cover up some of her pounds.

“You know, weight is the main reason they make clothing. Why would anyone buy it but to hide those few unwanted inches here and there? A good fashion sense can cover a multitude of sins.”

Sources close to Cheysuli say she’s going to need someone particularly gifted in fashion sense to help out. “I mean even Daisy the Curly Cat is likely to have trouble disguising that football she appears to have swallowed.”

Cheysuli Languishes Beside Empty Food Dish

img_5992aA sign of the times, here I am wasting away near my empty food dish. How many other cats are suffering in this economy? Even Microsoft laid off nearly 1400 people (almost 900 of them in the Seattle area). We need assistance now.

The new President needs to get some things passed. We need incentives for people to continue buying their cats premium cat food. How about cat food vouchers for good cat food? How about a nationwide veterinary health plan? We need people to build stroller lanes for cats out walking. This would mean more jobs for those building the infrastructure. And how about rebuilding, retooling, refitting and just redoing many of our shelters? They can all be solar and wind power and thundering herd of elephant powered buildings!

__________

Editor’s note: Cheysuli please note that that semi empty dish is really only your extra water dish upstairs and not a food dish and make changes appropriately. CHEYSULI!

Meezer Toe Monday

I hope you enjoy my back toes. I use these to bunny kick.

So the Woman is thinking of a retrospective. You know, end of the year and all. And she started blogging on this blog in early January 2006–three years ago, although my first post wasn’t until April (and who would want to read that before then).

So here we are coming up on the Big Three for blogging!

We have to thank the Meezers, Derby, The Big Piney Woods Cats who were then the Calico Girls and of course Kukka-Maria.

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