Then there came the Cats Rule the World Contest and of course I was asked so I hope you’ll go vote for me and you can only vote once for one cat. Each cat is hoping to rule the world to win money and useful gifts for their favorite shelter. I hope that everything goes to Purrfect Pals, so when you vote, you are not just voting for me, but for them!
Who better than me to rule the world? I have the experience with politics and can give short pithy answers or nuanced versions. I understand how to put my paw down when I want my way. I’m not afraid to get my paws a little dirty. Further, my closet skeletons are very well buried. No one remembers the pooting incident. My ties to the Catstra Nostra and the rumors that I’m the Cat Mother of the organization are old news. Who wants to hear it again? I’ve made no income so I have no tax returns to show.
As ruler of the world, of course, it makes no difference where I was born, either in the US or Siam.
I am running against some other potential talent, but I’m not sure any of them have the experience in dirty campaign politics, many of them being far too nice. As for the others, are they really ready for that 2 PM wake up call?