Face it, humans are great time wasters, aren’t they? It’s part of our commitment to them, as cats, that we work with them to stop wasting time.
1. Computers are great time waster for humans. Additionally their time wasting on our computers can mean that we don’t get to blog. Sit between the human and the keyboard. Better yet, if you can sit ON the keyboard.
2. They get these newspapers or glossy magazines that they hold in front of their faces and then sit silently. I realize most humans claim to be reading them. Remember that you need to be between them and whatever they are wasting time with. It may require sitting on the newspaper. This can really bother them.
3. Changing the sheets. You know I don’t know why humans insist that after all the work we do that they want to change these sheets. Then we have to scent them all over again. Well we must roll on the sheets both when they are being taken off and then put back on. Multiple cat households should work together. A game of cat and mouse with one under a sheet and one on top is EXCELLENT.
4. Humans think they need to cook and eat food. I think if they are working with food, we have a right to be there. I don’t know why they think that we shouldn’t be. Always get your mouth as close to the food as possible. This makes them eat faster. If they don’t, you might get a piece. Typically though, they will interupt their eating to try and move you. Remember to keep working those tricks until they give up and stop eating!
5. While talking on the phone can be used productively, not all humans do so. If your human is not sitting comfortable petting your fur while they chat, then something needs to be done. If they have a corded or cordless phone step on it. A cell phone… this one is harder but if they have that thing in their, it’s a great cord to play with. If you bat it hard enough you might just pull it out of their ear.
Each of these tips is designed to help you keep your human from wasting time in the usual manner of the human species. Remember they don’t know any better. Always treat them gently and with love and kindness, or at least until they deserve otherwise.