Feature Friday:I’ll Raise you A Poot

img_2836a.JPGFrom the AP

Hillary Clinton may have garnered support with her spontaneous show of tears, but Critters for Total World Domination Candidate Cheysuli has taken this spontaneity one step farther. After a sumptuous feast on the campaign trail, Cheysuli stepped out to talk. Right in the middle of the speech, during a pause as the applause died down, the listeners heard “fffffffffssssssstttttt” and then were exposed to a noxious smell.

“It was completely spontaneous. I mean we’ve all been there in that embarrassing moment. It made her human… er feline,” said one supporter.

“She couldn’t have planned it better,” stated one political pundit. “We’ve been begging candidates for authenticity and this is as authentic as it gets.”

“I have no doubt that the surge you have seen in her polling since yesterday is because of this. I mean it’s real.”

“Had I known,” stated Cheysuli, “I’d have had Fox news filming me in my litter box. See what they could make of that!”

“This is a tough one to top. Even Hillary Clinton’s tears weren’t this real,” said an unnamed source.

“Yeah, I’m sure in general it should help her campaign, but you weren’t in the room,” responded another (former) supporter.

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Comments

  1. hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

    oops, i think i pooted too

    hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

    Miles

  2. QUICK!!!! somebody get the repair kit, Chey sprung a leak!!

    Sammy

  3. I truly believe your poot was far more genuine than Hillary Clinton’s tears. Here in the U.K. the media keep banging on about the possibility of there being “the first woman president” or “the first black president” but no mention is ever made about “the first feline president”. That would be far more interesting and I know you would do a better job:) xxx

  4. I think I prefer Crying in the Rain, which is one of my favourite old movies. Except for the rain, that is.
    Lynettea says that a lot of things in politics make a nasty smell if you find out about them, so perhaps you are a natural politician Chey.

  5. Wowie kazowie, if pootin gets votes, why didn’t I think of gettin into politicks?? I am the Prince of Poot! Maybe when I’m oldur I’ll run fur Prezzident and start the Poot Party and run onna Poot Platform!

    (it would be a kinda steenky platform, don’tchya think? hehe)

    Kittyhugs and purrs from MaoMao!

  6. F Ferocious
    A Atrocious
    R Repititious
    T Tooting
    on the campaign trail can only be considered a publicity stunt.

  7. Who knew that pooting would make you more popular among voters, Chey! Wow. We have to confess, we both poot on occasion, and they are quite noxious. They are silent though, so the only evidence of them is their smell. Is that TMI?

    You are certainly authentic, Chey, and we are glad this has helped your campaign. 😀

  8. It’s never the sound that gets you in trouble, it’s always the smell!

  9. Having a new fart in office would certainly be better than the old farts that usually get elected, eh?

  10. Hehe that should raise your standing cuz efurrycat and Bean knows pollytishuns always spout a lot of hot air.

  11. If Chey doesn’t get elected that’ll just prove that authentic isn’t really what the people want. Bread and circuses is probably all they want really, says Mom. I think they just want hot air disguised as perfume.

  12. This is very funny! We agree with Diamond Emarald-Eyes, ehehehe. That’s a nice picture of you Chey! Is that your official campaign picture?

  13. Good job getting the press’s attention! Just proves that you are the candidate who is the most down home and closest to knowing what the American people want – the American males anyway. Males are known for making those sounds and smells!

  14. Poots for Peace.. what a brilliant campaign strategy.

    You go girl!
    xooxo

  15. Brilliant! Kaze says she’ll take the fall should this positive spin take a different direction.

    She thanks you for your HIGHLY generous offer of the fev-ver toy. She was floored!

  16. Wow, Chey! Who knew that was all it took to get your popularity to skyrocket? You are right, maybe your next press conference should be held at the litterbox!

  17. Oh Chey, I’ll bet you had everyone in tears…

  18. Hey when I pop a cork I always turn around and see what happened…does anyone else do that?

    Miss Gemini
    I am sorry your Seahawks lost to the Packers…my team lost to the Giants and our local team lost to the Pats…so I just picked one of the remaining 4 to root for…please join me and let’s root em on!

    Purrrrrrrrrr

  19. Chey, I will be more than happy to poot on the good citizens of NY when I campaign for you next week.

    Miles

  20. Chey, I think that was a very well thought out ‘spontaneous’ poot, ripe with symbolism. It exhibited that you are a candidate who will cut the hot air in this campaign and bring Winds of Cheynge to the Whitehouse.

    Rocky

  21. What a lovely picture of you, Chey — you look so reflective! Your post made me think, too, about how it would go over if one of the bean presidential candidates pooted where everyone could hear. *smile*

    I can imagine the headlines: “Presidential Candidates Exchange Poots!”

    Purrs and snuggles from Marilyn!

  22. Were you secretly showing how you feel about some of the current animal abuse laws?

  23. What’s a Poot?

    Our Grampy is the biggest Pats fan ever and he says he’s just glad he has lived long enough to finally see his teams win. Apparently, they sucked wind pretty bad all Grampy’s life.

    Oh… Poot!

  24. Chey if you poot enough you will have everyone tearing up. That tearing up won’t be an act!

    Poot early and poot often!

  25. Mebbe whats made da Hilary cry waz da exposure to da sulphuric and a-moania content of da fart molly-culez.

    Haz you evfur driven by a cow poot pile???

    Mebbe Hilary haz nevfur been on a country road beforez. Mebbe she should puts on dat John Denver record & play,”Country Road..take me home..” It could be her new campaign slogan. “Da softer side of hot air.”

    Chey, you really didz it dis time! It may be da fart dat backfired!

  26. You pooted???? Hahahahaha!!!!Hang on,BRB, I have to go check out TMZ for the video!. (You just know they have it!)

    Purrs Mickey

  27. We like the ‘…it should help her campaign, but you weren’t in the room’ comment. Heh, heh…You’ve put one over Hilary again. Why she just won’t admit defeat and join your campaign, we’ll just never know.

    Purrs

    Gypsy & Tasha

  28. Of course your poot was completely spontaneous! What candidate would fart just to gain popularity? Although, if such a situation can be used to advantage, a smart candidate will make the most of it, ha!

    Mindy & Moe

  29. Wasn’t it President Lyndon Johnson who insisted on making his staffers follow him to the bathroom so he could continue to give them instructions? Unfortunatly, you wouldn’t be the first to show your bathroom habits to an unsuspecting audience.

    We gave you an award. Come by to pick it up.

    Tiki, Tavi, Cody and Camie

  30. Reading this made me laugh real hard especially after remembering Spontaneous Combustion episode of South Park. Very nice post.

  31. It’s a handsome picture. A little fierce on the projection but will do as an official campaign picture. Looks someone with real authority. 😀

  32. You should win just on this photo alone. FAZ

  33. We wondered what happened to our comment on this post and just found we posted it to the previous one. Oops.

    jans funny farm

  34. Whooops! You meant to do that, right?

    Luf, Us

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